Thinking Out Loud # 20

Hello, Hello

I hope you have had a wonderful week. Only one more day left. Wow, this week seemed to go by so quick. Since, it’s Thursday it’s time for thinking out loud. I must say I missed last week and I didn’t like it one bit. Thursdays are one of my favorite days in my blogging. I love being able to share all my random thinking with all of you. Thank Amanda for hosting.

Thinking-Out-Loud (2)

1. I noticed our pantry and freezer have been over flowing lately, so for the next couple weeks we are only buying produce, milk, yogurt, etc. Basically, we have to eat what we have. I hate wasting food and I know we have far too much. So, tonight we had a mix of stuffed shells and rolled manicotti (we have had those noodles in there forever). Classy, I know!!

WIAW 39 - stuffed shells

2. I read this on one of my favorite fitness pages and I really love this way of thinking about eating. “When you are eating clean and choose not to eat junk. Think of it as it is your choice not to eat badly. Don’t think that you can’t have it. Always remember you can have whatever you want but you choose not to.” I love that quote it is the way we all should think.

3. You know how I always talk about loving my workouts. Well, I really do. I look forward to doing them day in and day out, to the point that I haven’t been taking days off. I know, I know it’s bad, but I really enjoy my morning workouts and I enjoy that it is my time. If you love your workout you will never feel like you “work” out a day in your life. Oh and the new blogilates calendar is out. Whoo hoo!! I love starting a new month.

4. I can’t believe Steve and I leave for Las Vegas in just over two weeks. I am so excited to spend a few days with just my hubby. We definitely need this time together. I am going to miss my babies, but I know I will come back refreshed and ready to be the best mom ever. Of course, I have mom guilt, but that never ends. Why do we hold ourselves to such higher standards then everyone else? I feel as though we, moms/women, expect perfection from ourselves. Why are we never enough? Why can’t we ever take a break without feeling bad? We need to realize we are good enough. We do everything we can to be the best for our children. We are enough!!

5. One thing I have been thinking about lately is how different, but equally wonderful my relationship is with each of my girls. I love them all so very much. I am so blessed to have four daughters and cannot wait for our relationships to grow.

6. Lately, I have been sad with how much our babies are becoming toddlers. Yes, I am excited for this next phase, but boy is it hard to imagine not having any more babies in our house. I truly try to cherish each moment with McKenzie and McKayla, but some days it is not easy. Nothing is easy when it comes to twins. They sure love to keep my on my toes.

7. I love my new business venture. I love that it has given me something that is my own. I love my little bit of work I can fit in throughout the day. It is something other then laundry, cleaning, etc.

8. I can’t believe tomorrow is August 1st. Summer is going to be over before we know it and Sophia is going to be starting kindergarten. Wow, that makes me so sad. My little girls is going to school. I am going to truly miss my buddy. She is such a good girl. Seriously, this makes me cry just thinking about it. I wish I could keep her this age forever. I want to stay right here always and forever. She is amazing!!

Now it’s your turn.

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WIAW # 83 – Mid-Day Treat

Good evening everyone. Wow, it has been a day. Steve has been traveling and I truly hate when he is not home; I miss him our family feels s incomplete when he is gone. I am so thankful he comes home tonight and will be home for the next week. But then he is off again. I know he hates being away just as much as we hate having him gone and I know he does all of this for us. He works hard so our family and we love him for that. I will tell you I wouldn’t be able to survive without my mom. I seriously, would go nuts, okay maybe I am already nut, but I would be even nuttier. Ha!! Sophia and Isabella say I am silly, but that’s the way they like it. They always tell me they wouldn’t want me to be serious. Oh my girls are the best. Back to my mom, I am not sure why she always comes back; life here can be tough, but there is lots of love and kisses.

Since it’s Wednesday it’s time to talk about food. Here is what I ate Wednesday.

Breakfast 7am

After working out this morning instead of my usual protein shake I had pumpkin protein pancakes with turkey sausage. Lots of protein and it was nice eating with the girls.

wiaw - pumpkin pancakes

Snack 10am

I had a poached egg on an English muffin with a bowl of fruit. So delicious.

wiaw - fruit 2

Lunch 1pm

Okay, I was in the mood for something sweet so I made a Paleo/Gluten Free Chocolate Cake. Oh so good and it really hit the spot. I notice when I give into what I am craving I don’t pick at things I don’t want.

chocolate cake - paleo gluten free

Dinner 4:30pm

I had to run some errands (this was a much needed break from motherhood) so on my way home I picked up sandwiches (chicken, pesto flatbread) and smoothies for us. So, we had an early dinner.

wiaw - chicken flatbread wiaw - smoothie

Snack 7:30pm

Since, we ate dinner early I was hungry again so I shared a bowl of Kashi GoLean with McKayla.

WIAW 43 - go lean cereal

In the Comments Below:

  1. What was your favorite food from this week?
  2. Do you ever have a sweet treat mid-day? And does that seem to help you not snack so much?
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Our 1st Year with Twins

Where do I begin. I guess I start with it wasn’t what I expected. As moms we have this picture of beauty and perfection, but it was far from that. I quickly learned that this year was going to be so much different then with our singletons.

Twins at 9 Week Ultrasound

Twins at 9 Week Ultrasound

It all started with the pregnancy. Mono/di (one placenta, two sacs) twins are high risk our girls were also diagnosed with TTTS; which put our twin pregnancy at an even higher risk. Through out the 34 weeks we were constantly worried and stressed about what might happen to our girls. Throughout the pregnancy I was unable to workout or even pick up my girls (this was hard on me). The last few weeks I was put on strict bed rest. The most difficult part about these 9 months was not being able to do everything I used to with Sophia and Isabella. Oh and then there was the labor and delivery which I must say was my easiest one. It might have something to do with this being my third time, but anyway it was a wonderful experience. I had to deliver in the OR which was something completely new to us. And within 5 minutes of meeting our girls they were taken to the NICU; this was awful. I can’t even describe what that felt like, but it was the worst feeling in the world.

1st year with twins - collage

And so our first year with twins began with our girls in the NICU, being taken care of by someone other then me (this part killed me). I hated not being with them day in and day out. I wanted to be the one to take care of them when they cried, wanted to eat, wanted to snuggle, etc. I wanted to be everything they needed. But, I knew they needed to be in the NICU to be taken care of by the nurses until they were ready to come home. Leaving the hospital without them was an experience I don’t wish on anyone. Driving home without our little babies was heartbreaking. So, our first year was definitely not starting off how I had wished and hope. I knew being born early they would need the NICU, but deep down I wished they would be miracle babies and just come home with us. Don’t we all wish for the best?

McKenzie came home after 12 days in the NICU; which doesn’t sound like much, but boy did those 12 days seem to take forever at the time. I hated leaving her day in and day out. But it certainly became much more difficult with one baby home and one baby still at the hospital. McKayla came home after 19 days in the NICU. They came home exactly 1 week apart. Getting McKayla home was not an easy task. We were told on Sunday that she could come home the next day, but then we got a call Monday morning telling us she didn’t pass her car seat test; my heart broke into a million pieces. As I write this I am crying, all I wanted was bring her home. I can’t even begin to describe how hard that was for me. But Steve and I knew we wanted her home and would do anything to have that happen. So I researched and researched and found a car seat that seemed to work better for tiny babies (at this time McKayla was hovering around 4 lbs.). Steve left work bought the car seat brought it to the hospital and she passed!! Our family was able to be all together on Monday July 22nd. It was a day I will never forget.

McKayla and McKenzie at Home - First Time 2

Emotionally, these beginning weeks were rough on me. Who am I kidding this entire year has been rough on me. I hated not being able to be with Sophia and Isabella all the time and I hated not being with McKenzie and McKayla every minute of every day. I was in  a very sad and dark place and not to mention throughout these few weeks I had just delivered two babies. One thing I learned is if you are NICU mom there is no time to recover, you simply have to pull it together and go. There are no days spent in your jammies cuddling your new bundle(s) of joy, there and no days taking naps and resting until you are completely healed. There is no holding them nursing all day long (I got to hold a pump; lovely). No, you have to get up and get dressed every day to go see your little baby(ies). I am not going to lie it’s hard, it sucks!

Once, we had all our girls home and together life seemed to go much smoother (still difficult, but smoother). McKenzie and McKayla were still in the sleepy newborn stage so our older girls were able to adjust slowly and so were we. But that didn’t last long.

McKenzie and McKayla were about one month old when colic struck. Oh boy these next few months were miserable. They would both scream from about 6-9pm every night until they were 4 months old. Yes, both babies had colic and absolutely nothing worked. Until one glorious day it just stopped. These few months were difficult, very difficult. It was hard on the entire family. The crying really starts to take a toll on you and it is not easy to go day in and day out not being able to do anything about it.

We had a few months of calm before our next storm hit us, ear infections and teething. Yes, McKenzie and McKayla has ear infection after ear infection. Seriously, when we would finally get one better the other one would get it and so forth. This went on for 6 months until we finally got tubes put in just after their 1st birthday. This means we had no sleep this entire first year. Yes, we have been living our lives in a complete fog. Exhaustion doesn’t even describe how I have felt each and every day. Finally after their surgery sleep has started to take place and I feel like a new women. You can really do anything with just a little sleep.

This year has been hard, really hard. One of the worst parts for me was not loving being a mom this year. I truly love being a mom and I know this is what God put me here to be, but being a mom this past year made me question it time and time again. This year has really tested me and some days I think I may have failed, but I would always pick myself back up and try again the next. This year was tough; lack of sleep, colicky babies, ear infection after ear infection. This year has been emotionally draining. Motherhood has always come easy to me, but not with twins. This has definitely been a new challenge. The biggest thing I regret about this year is not cherishing this year as much as I should have. I regret getting frustrated and feeling sad. I regret not always being the best mom to my girls. I regret feeling tired and hopeless. I regret feeling defeated, pretty much all the time. So, please if you are a mom and you are feeling tired and alone try to remember this to shall pass. These moments go by way to quick and I am so sad to see my little babies growing up. As difficult as this year has been I am going to miss it.

I will say most days I can’t even believe we have survived this first year, but we did. It may not have been pretty, it may not have always been happy, but we have all made it through and we are stronger for it. Through all the tears there has been lots of smiles too. There are still days were all I can do is cry with them. Being a mom to twins puts an emotional strain on you like nothing else. You are pulled in so many directions and it is beyond difficult to always be on top of your game; especially when you are lacking in sleep.

Even though this year has been a difficult one I would do it all over again to have my sweet girls in my life. No matter what happens I would do anything for my girls. There is always light at the end of the tunnel. Remember that you are stronger then you think and God have you this life because he knew you could handle it. You are amazing remember that.

These faces make it all worth it.

12 months - mckenzie silly

12 months - mckayla princess car smile


mimm - twins 1st birthday me steve twins

Posted in Babies | 3 Comments

Why Rodan and Fields?

Lately, I have been getting a lot of emails asking why I decided to take on my own business with four little ones. Yes, I know I am crazy, but really this business is so easy to work around my busy house. I seriously, work 5 minutes here and 15 minutes there. I might do a little work once my little ones go to bed while watching TV. I love how I can make this business work for me and my family. I love that I can make people feel good in their skin. R+F truly has something for everyone. I simply love seeing people happy. Happiness is a beautiful thing.


Rodan + Fields has changed my skin… Well, it all begin about 6 months after having McKenzie and McKayla. I was not feeling so great about myself. I wasn’t loving my post-baby body, I was overwhelmed and exhausted, my house was a mess, and skin was not so great. I simply didn’t feel good about myself, I felt… blah. I decided I had to do something, this had to change. So, I called my friend Kristen (who started selling Rodan + Fields a few months earlier) and told her I needed help. I hated my forehead lines, uneven and dull skin tone, and so much more. Kristen recommended the REDEFINE line with the AMP MD system. I said yes right away. I wasn’t sure what to expect, but I had high hopes. And guess what it didn’t disappoint. I couldn’t be happier. I have never loved my skin as much as I do now. My skin has never looked so good. I actually leave my house feeling confident without putting on a stitch of make-up. I truly love my skin. Now when I wear make-up it’s because I WANT to, not because I have to. Best feeling ever!!

Make-up free. Oh my!!

Rodan + Fields - makeup free

and My Life - Why I decided to get into the business side of R + F For quite some time now I have just not felt fulfilled I hate saying that because being with my girls is my everything and I love it. But I just wanted something that was mine, other then the everyday cleaning, cooking, laundry, etc. But I knew I was not going to leave my girls. My friend Kristen got into the business to be able to stay at home with her daughter (after only 6 months she has replaced her teaching paycheck and quit her job to be with her daughter). She is a true example what this business can do for your life. I fell in love with the products and just knew I had to share them with everyone I know. Skincare is my thing. I love everything about it. As, some of you know I worked at Merle Norman for years (during high school and college) and I would still be there if I could. :) Rodan + Fields gives me the opportunity to share my love for skincare and be home with my girls. Some days I question why I decided to take on one more thing, then I get on a call with a client and I know I did the right thing. I love connecting and talking to other women about how we can make their skin look and feel the best it can be.

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If you want to feel good in your skin message me and we can make that happen. Loving your skin is possible. Trust me!! If you do what you have always done you will get what you’ve always gotten.


It’s the hope, the dream, the life to come that has brought me to Rodan + Fields. I am a dreamer and a believer. But, I also know things don’t come to those who sit back and relax. You have to make things happen!!


Posted in Rodan + Fields | 2 Comments